A completely inebriated man walked into a bar and, after staring for some time at the only woman seated at the bar, he walked over to her and immediately started putting his hands all over her.
She jumped up and slapped him silly.
He immediately apologized and explained, "I'm sorry. I thought you were my wife. You look exactly like her."
"Why you drunken, worthless, insufferable idiot!" she screamed.
"That's funny," he muttered, "You even sound exactly like her."