Two voters (Democrat I suppose) from Palm Beach County FL were hangin' out, and one said to the other "Hey, lets go for a walk" and the other replied "Can't do it, I'm already chewing gum".

If you want to have a near-death experience in South Florida, walk out in front of a Cadillac or Lincoln with nothing but white hair showing up over the steering wheel. They always have the right of way, when the car is big and reaction time is measured with a calendar.

Scary place to live. My little Datsun would have been not much more than a speed bump.

Heyyyyyyyyyy Mike, I resemble that remark!!

Dan

I think your head probably shows above the steering wheel, Dan. You haven't been scared until you realize that some of those folks are looking UNDER the top of the steering wheel when they are driving.

Honest to God true story. My in-laws lived in Flippin Arkansas, the second largest retirement community in the US. When we were going out to visit, my M.I.L. warned, watch out for the old folks. They drive like they own the road.
Truer words were never spoken. We were just outside Flippin, in Mt. Home, MO, when some little white-haired lady, I think the sister to the one in FL, all you could see was a blue-white curly mop above the steering wheel, blew through a red light (it had been green for me for several seconds, but I saw her coming and there was no indication of her slowing down, she didn't) shooting across the road in front of me without a care in the world. I suppose she figured she had paid taxes on those roads for 60 years and by golly she DID own the road.
Like my M.I.L. was fond of saying, "There are more crazy people out on the road when I am driving." I don't think she ever did figure out why we broke up laughing every time she said that.

Florida is particularly bad, due to the volatile mix of college kids in sports cars, retirees in land yachts, drug runners, Cuban ex-pats who are mad about everything, and Carribean island immigrants who learned to drive on dirt roads following donkey carts. It has to be seen to be believed, and once you've seen it, you wish you hadn't.

The TV show "Miami Vice" was frighteningly close to the truth, except possibly events on the show were slightly less chaotic than real life.

My wife grew up between Long Island Ny, and Ft. Lauderdale Fla. She used to tell me how much she just HATED the old Jewish American retirees and their "I own it" philosophy, and the Cubanos mentioned above. This coming from a pseudo New Yorker? Wisely, I just bite my tongue.

All the times I have ever been to Fla, and especialy to the southern reaches, I am always greatful that I learned to drive in Pa, where fast, aggressive driving is a skill that hones your situational awareness, and being able to "see" the immediate future is a gift. There is no telling how many times I have saved my family, just 'cause I knew where the greyhairs were, and took an educated guess at were they thought they were going.

Gotta love driving a Suburban!

Sorta like this area when the annual flocking of the winter Snowbirds arrive.

It's **** to get behind a vehicle with "up north" plates. It will be brim full of white and blue heads, all talking at the same time and pointing to different points of the compass, looking where each other is pointing and wandering down the road at 20 mph in the far inside lane. Left or right turns are made without regard for turning lanes, opposing traffic or the frantic honking of cutoff vehicles.

'Course, I don't qualify - don't have enough hair left to worry about and my plates are in-state!! :D