» Advanced

Go Back   Shooters Forum > General > Humor
Register FAQ Members List Donate Calendar Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read



Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Rate Thread Display Modes
  #1  
Old 02-18-2012, 08:32 AM
DOK DOK is offline
"Bad Joke Friday" Dan (moderator)
 
Join Date: May 2001
Location: Iowa
Posts: 7,683
Talking Centipede...


Registered Users do not see the above ad.


I missed Friday, so another day late and dollar short, but this one is my intellectual level, so wanted to belatedly share it.

The Talking Centipede
A single guy decided life would be more fun
if he had a pet.
So he went to the pet store
and told the owner
that he wanted to buy an unusual pet.
After some discussion,
he finally bought a talking centipede,
(100-legged bug),
which came in a little white box
to use for his house.
He took the box back home,
found a good spot for the box,
and decided he would start off
by taking his new pet
to church with him.
So he asked the centipede
in the box,
"Would you like to go
to church with me today?
We will have a good time."
But there was no answer
from his new pet.
This bothered him a bit,
but he waited a few minutes
and then asked again,
"How about going
to church with me
and receive blessings?"
But again,
there was no answer
from his new friend and pet.
So he waited
a few minutes more,
thinking about the situation.
The guy decided
to invite the centipede
one last time.
This time he
put his face up against
the centipede's house and shouted,
"Hey, in there!
Would you like to go
to
church with me
and learn about God?"
.....
YOU ARE GOING TO LOVE THIS ......
This time,
a little voice
came out of the box,
"I heard you the first time!
I'm putting my shoes on!"
__________________
DOK
Reply With Quote
  #2  
Old 02-18-2012, 09:43 AM
Beartooth Regular
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Mooresville, IN
Posts: 9,039
and thus we have found the one creature on the plant that actually takes longer to get ready to go somewhere than a woman.
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old 02-18-2012, 11:44 AM
The Troll Whisperer (Moderator)
 
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Mesa, Arizona
Posts: 19,787
Good'un, Dan!
__________________
NRA Benefactor Member
NRA Certified Police Firearms Instructor
NRA Certified Range Safety Officer
NAHC Life Member

"Firearms only have two enemies - rust and politicans" author unknown
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old 04-03-2012, 10:52 AM
Sus Scrofa's Avatar
Beartooth Regular
 
Join Date: May 2010
Location: England UK
Posts: 2,478
Brill

Did not see that one coming. Very funny indeed. Unfortunately I am married to a blonde and she wouldn't get it. Would probably look all dumb and say " but, centipedes don't wear shoes", totally missing the fact that it could talk Keep 'em coming, we need some humour over here in the UK at the moment.
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old 04-03-2012, 01:44 PM
DOK DOK is offline
"Bad Joke Friday" Dan (moderator)
 
Join Date: May 2001
Location: Iowa
Posts: 7,683
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sus Scrofa View Post
Did not see that one coming. Very funny indeed. Unfortunately I am married to a blonde and she wouldn't get it. Would probably look all dumb and say " but, centipedes don't wear shoes", totally missing the fact that it could talk Keep 'em coming, we need some humour over here in the UK at the moment.

Trust me, your need for some humor the way things are going is an identical twin to our situation(s). If we didn't laugh, we'd be crying

Dan
__________________
DOK
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old 04-11-2012, 08:15 PM
Beartooth Regular
 
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Alberta
Posts: 434
Told this one to an Anglican priest friend of mine and now I'm sure it will end up in his next service.......
Reply With Quote
  #7  
Old 04-12-2012, 04:51 AM
jodum's Avatar
Piney Woods Moderator
 
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Benton, LA
Posts: 5,257
Thank goodness my wife is not a centipede. Her closet isn't large enough.
__________________
Please stay back. I am allergic to stupidity. (K5JWO)
Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes Rate This Thread
Rate This Thread:

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
talking dog nimrod375 Humor 0 12-09-2009 12:49 AM
Tired of talking about lack of stuff and politics? Everett General Discussion 14 05-27-2009 02:31 AM
The talking dog argo Humor 1 12-23-2008 05:21 PM
A talking clock!!!!!!! DOK Humor 0 10-28-2003 11:34 AM


All times are GMT -8. The time now is 03:51 PM.

< Contact Us - Shooters Forum - Archive >

 
 

All Content & Design Copyright © 1999-2002 Beartooth Bullets, All Rights Reserved
View Privacy Policy | Contact Webmaster | Legal Information
Website Design & Development By Exbabylon Internet Solutions
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
SEO by vBSEO 3.6.0 PL2