I had a dream about two weeks ago:
I was kayaking somewhere in Alaska on a level three river. Armed with bear spray and my trusty ol' Mossberg Pump, I proceeded downstream looking for a nice fishing spot. The day on the river had been serene and sunny for the most part. However, clouds were beginning to appear on the horizon and the downstream winds were picking up. I could see that there was a sharp meandering turn in the river quickly approaching. Tree branches obscured my line of vision as I navigated the meandering river. As I pushed the overhanging foilage aside, I could plainly see over a dozen grizzly bears fishing for salmon in the direct path of my kayak. This part of the river was fast and only about twenty feet wide. It looked like some kind of bear jamboree or something! The closest bears, were two cubs standing in the middle of my path just thirty feet before my bow. The mother bear was intently fishing behind them with her back facing both me and her cubs.
I immediately began to back-paddle, making the most horrendous splashing sounds ever known to man. It seemed that this splashing interrupted the fishing party and all eyes were upon me. It appeared as though I was making neither forward nor backward progress. I felt as though I was only delaying the inevitable. Suddenly, the mother bear stood erect some eight feet from the floor of the river. Her massive body blocked the sun as her huge mitts were stretched over her head poised and ready to strike. She looked like a giant goalie preparing to knock the heck out of a puck! The bear loudly howled and her cubs swiftly scrambled behind her. I quickly grabbed onto an overhanging branch and pulled both myself and my kayak onto the shallows of the river bank. I hopped out of the kayak and quickly grabbed my Mossberg Pump and the bear spray.
I slowly backed towards solid ground with the kayak between me and the bear. Once upon the bank, I quickly tossed the kayak into the brush. This quick movement of the kayak seemed to have incensed the mother bear. She suddenly began to charge me! As I tried to back away, I could sense something moving behind me. It was yet another cub! I tried to move to my right, away from both mother bear and cub. Holding the spray with my left hand and the Mossberg in my right, I suddenly tripped over a fallen tree branch. I dropped the Mossberg and inadvertently sprayed my trousers with the bear spray. It was all too late!
At that very instant, the bear pounced, and my wife nudged me real hard to once again, warn me about hogging up all the bed covers...
Shssh! That was close!
PS.
Sometimes, I really do love my wife!
(Double-Click on the photo)
I was kayaking somewhere in Alaska on a level three river. Armed with bear spray and my trusty ol' Mossberg Pump, I proceeded downstream looking for a nice fishing spot. The day on the river had been serene and sunny for the most part. However, clouds were beginning to appear on the horizon and the downstream winds were picking up. I could see that there was a sharp meandering turn in the river quickly approaching. Tree branches obscured my line of vision as I navigated the meandering river. As I pushed the overhanging foilage aside, I could plainly see over a dozen grizzly bears fishing for salmon in the direct path of my kayak. This part of the river was fast and only about twenty feet wide. It looked like some kind of bear jamboree or something! The closest bears, were two cubs standing in the middle of my path just thirty feet before my bow. The mother bear was intently fishing behind them with her back facing both me and her cubs.
I immediately began to back-paddle, making the most horrendous splashing sounds ever known to man. It seemed that this splashing interrupted the fishing party and all eyes were upon me. It appeared as though I was making neither forward nor backward progress. I felt as though I was only delaying the inevitable. Suddenly, the mother bear stood erect some eight feet from the floor of the river. Her massive body blocked the sun as her huge mitts were stretched over her head poised and ready to strike. She looked like a giant goalie preparing to knock the heck out of a puck! The bear loudly howled and her cubs swiftly scrambled behind her. I quickly grabbed onto an overhanging branch and pulled both myself and my kayak onto the shallows of the river bank. I hopped out of the kayak and quickly grabbed my Mossberg Pump and the bear spray.
I slowly backed towards solid ground with the kayak between me and the bear. Once upon the bank, I quickly tossed the kayak into the brush. This quick movement of the kayak seemed to have incensed the mother bear. She suddenly began to charge me! As I tried to back away, I could sense something moving behind me. It was yet another cub! I tried to move to my right, away from both mother bear and cub. Holding the spray with my left hand and the Mossberg in my right, I suddenly tripped over a fallen tree branch. I dropped the Mossberg and inadvertently sprayed my trousers with the bear spray. It was all too late!
At that very instant, the bear pounced, and my wife nudged me real hard to once again, warn me about hogging up all the bed covers...
Shssh! That was close!
PS.
Sometimes, I really do love my wife!
(Double-Click on the photo)